And so it begins, again...

And so it begins. Today was our middle-est daughters 20th birthday party and it was a doozy! She had some friends over for a sleepover and right now they are downstairs watching a Little Mermaid movie right now. I say that this is the beginning because it is the point that I can trace our oldest daughters childhood waning and her adolescent-hood waxing.

Amber turned 10 the year after I got back from Iraq and she was trying to get out of control. She wasn't there yet, but she was getting to be a handful. For her 10th birthday, we implemented some "controls." Rather than become ultra-strict and overbearing, we decided to give her a little room to grow. We got her a cell-phone and a computer and we let her explore the wide world of the internet with fewer controls. Some would say that that was a bad idea, that we should tighten down and keep her shielded from all the badness in the internet world. Well, thats not how I see it.

Once she was hooked into the internet world, with her online friends and personality, she could no more abandon it than she could cut off her own hand. That gave us the ultimate power to take away or restrict her access to get her to do what we needed her to do - and it continues to this day. She will very quickly change her attitude or adjust her behavior if her online world is on the line - so to speak. Same with her cellphone.

Of course, we still monitor her every movement online (and off) from a distance. Its like we have a UAV watching her while we let her explore the world on her own. At the first sign of trouble, we're ready and able to step in and take care of it. Also, we've able to see where she's going and what's ahead - so we can advise her in that regard. But she still has the freedom to figure things out and explore her world.

So, now, a little over two years later it has finally happened - she has her first "boyfriend." Oh, she's had plenty of online boyfriends, but none that she's ever met in real life. We've known about "Josh" - name NOT changed to protect the innocent - for a little while, and we also know that it probably won't be the last one. But today, for the first time, we have met Amber's "boyfriend."

Earlier today, one of her girl friends came over and they all (Amber, her sisters, her friend, and the dog) went to the park. Well, why they were gone, we checked her MySpace page and found that she had a plan to meet Joshua at the park. No big surprise. What was a surprise was that she brought him home.

When he came into the living room, the first thing he mentioned was our decor - which has a bit of a war-like theme (we have posters and artifacts from various wars and conflicts the country has been involved in). I think he commented on our WWII poster of Iwo Jima. So, right off the bat, he gets bonus points for being smart and nerdy. Then, he seems nice and says his "Pleases" and "Thank Yous" like a gentlemen. Also, he was able to identify the Blackhawk model on our computer hutch. Apparently, at dinner he was holding hands with my daughter - thats not exactly kosher.

But, he stayed most of the day at our house and even asked his mom to come over to meet us. Which she did. She was very nice and we all had a good conversation. Joshua seemed reluctant to leave. Later, I found out that he had asked Amber to go see a movie sometime. Now, I need to decide whether or not she is ready. She's 12, what could happen? Hell, they couldn't even go see a PG-13 movie - what's below that? G? I suppose they could go see Wall-E - is that still in theaters? Maybe we could ALL go to a movie, and we'd be sure to sit behind them a few rows.

Honestly, the kid is a little bit too good. I know my daughter, she can be a pain, and she can be controlling. I almost want to warn HIM about her. "Run! Josh! Run! Before its too late!" She is wise, and dangerous, beyond her years.

And so it begins, again.